I put a desk up in my room.
I feel so big, and grown up with it in my room. I know that probably sounds completely silly, but having a place to put myself when I want to write, or when I want to read, or do my devotions. Now I will have a place to be. A place that's hidden behind my door, but not my bed, where I tend to fall asleep. I feel like my productivity will increase for this coming school year. with a station to put myself at. To work, or not to. I'll have a place to take out my sketch pad and sketch, or pull out some paints and hide while I work on making something beautiful. No TV distractions. No clock other than my phone, or computer. Things I have to diliberately look at to find the time. Where I won't be pestered. I can keep my back straight, use this desk to begin to pull myself back together. To soften the shock of the world I'm trying so hard to enter gracefully.
A Place a can either stress about entering the world, through college and such, or a place I can forget about entering college. I feel like this one singular peice of furniture is magical in so many ways. A haven of sorts. I need a haven. We all need havens. Havens show up in the strangest of places.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Day by Step; Step by Day
Life goes by day by day, whether you wish it to or not.
Each day is a step. Each person takes a step at a time.
Some days you want to stop stepping, and stay in that place in time for ever, but day by day time goes on, and stepping you continue forward.
Some days you want to skip a step or two, and leap into the days to come, but patience is demanded, and stepping, one by one, you continue on.
Some days you wish to turn, avoid what stands before you. You continue forward,only turning as sharply as time allows. brushed on the shoulder by the branches of the tragedy as step by step you walk by.
Some days you wish to take steps backwards. To go back to a lovely field you walked through, or to wander through a romantic forest. To reminis on the steps before., but you must keep moving forward, each foot in front of the other, one by one, day by day.
When you get tired of stepping, there is not stopping. No rest for your legs, and each day must continue past. You need strong arms to carry you; some to know when you really can't continue. Arms of a savior. A savior with wisdom to remind you the past is not worth returning too. A savior with eyes, that can look past the mountain you're climbing and say, "I can see it, it's beautiful." With a hand to hold as the shadows of the woods enclose around you in the middle of the night. A savior like Christ Jesus, to give you a reason to step forward, to keep moving every day.
Each day is a step. Each person takes a step at a time.
Some days you want to stop stepping, and stay in that place in time for ever, but day by day time goes on, and stepping you continue forward.
Some days you want to skip a step or two, and leap into the days to come, but patience is demanded, and stepping, one by one, you continue on.
Some days you wish to turn, avoid what stands before you. You continue forward,only turning as sharply as time allows. brushed on the shoulder by the branches of the tragedy as step by step you walk by.
Some days you wish to take steps backwards. To go back to a lovely field you walked through, or to wander through a romantic forest. To reminis on the steps before., but you must keep moving forward, each foot in front of the other, one by one, day by day.
When you get tired of stepping, there is not stopping. No rest for your legs, and each day must continue past. You need strong arms to carry you; some to know when you really can't continue. Arms of a savior. A savior with wisdom to remind you the past is not worth returning too. A savior with eyes, that can look past the mountain you're climbing and say, "I can see it, it's beautiful." With a hand to hold as the shadows of the woods enclose around you in the middle of the night. A savior like Christ Jesus, to give you a reason to step forward, to keep moving every day.
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Just Breathe
Just breathe. Life isn't as complicated as they say. So it's not as perfect as in the movies. No simple romance, or a heartbreak free love story, but it will some day seem like the story you always dreamed it to be. If you promise me that you'll just breathe. Don't fret about the nights you lie awake worrying, worry in your days when you can save the world, one phone call at a time. Don't hold on to the lies, stop wishing them true. Take a step back, take a deep breath. You may not have the love of those you once did, but you have love from the people sitting around the dinner table of your life. So the ones at the party were only there to have a good time. The table is set for game night. Laughter and no false promises.
Monday, August 2, 2010
Colors
The color is purple. You tell me the color is blue. You simply "forget" to mention it's blue with a little bit of red in the mix. I believe you. You didn't lie. You're golden! No lies.
I am beginning to realize that my life is being peppered with people like this. The people that read it are not likely to realize that it is them, they really believe the color is blue, even if their eyes say purple.
They are not seen as liers. Just people that are attempting to go through their everyday life, not looking into the aspect of the other people around them, and not finding the whole truth completely necessary, because there is blue in the color.
With the whole truth they may be seen as shallow, or there may be wrong in what they're doing. It's okay though, because the color is blue.
They don't need to care if the half truths that they're telling are hurting people because the whole truth is that nothing matters but them, because this world so OBVIOUSLY revolves around them. The color is blue.
You swear the color is blue. Well, may I remind you of your promise that it'd be the color orange? Where's the yellow? I see the red, even though there is no red in blue, because you know, the color IS blue. But even if the color is blue, you promised me there'd be yellow. Yellow with red, You promised me orange. Now You tell me that it's blue, when it's so obviously purple. I know it's purple, don't deny the reds, fork over the yellows.
Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. I want Orange, here's some Purple back for you.
I am beginning to realize that my life is being peppered with people like this. The people that read it are not likely to realize that it is them, they really believe the color is blue, even if their eyes say purple.
They are not seen as liers. Just people that are attempting to go through their everyday life, not looking into the aspect of the other people around them, and not finding the whole truth completely necessary, because there is blue in the color.
With the whole truth they may be seen as shallow, or there may be wrong in what they're doing. It's okay though, because the color is blue.
They don't need to care if the half truths that they're telling are hurting people because the whole truth is that nothing matters but them, because this world so OBVIOUSLY revolves around them. The color is blue.
You swear the color is blue. Well, may I remind you of your promise that it'd be the color orange? Where's the yellow? I see the red, even though there is no red in blue, because you know, the color IS blue. But even if the color is blue, you promised me there'd be yellow. Yellow with red, You promised me orange. Now You tell me that it's blue, when it's so obviously purple. I know it's purple, don't deny the reds, fork over the yellows.
Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. I want Orange, here's some Purple back for you.
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